To feed the Soul by Mikaela Miyamoto

Mikaela is writing a bunch of short stories for 13 Days 13 Shorts this year! To check out more stuff from Mikaela, visit www.mikaelamiyamoto.com

To feed the Soul

My family has this tradition that we started as soon as I could blow out my own candles. Every evening before my birthday we take the same picture. I’m given a single slice of cake with a single candle and placed in front of a mirror. I take a moment to look myself in the eyes and make a wish. Then I close my eyes and blow out the candle while my mom snaps a picture. It’s a fun tradition. I get a little cake and to make a little wish, and my mom gets a picture and a memory to add to her scrapbook. It’s funny, the pictures start to look really similar by the time I hit puberty, but my mom insists on taking them even now that I’m an adult. But I think it’s sweet. And I still get my cake! I did ask my mom why we do this the day before my birthday instead of the day of, but she shook it off just saying it was “tradition”. There was one year where I couldn’t go home before my birthday. My mom FREAKED. She called me sobbing, begging me to set up so she could somehow still take the picture. After calming her down, I agreed to FaceTime her so she could at least try to screenshot it and get her picture to go in her scrapbook. I didn’t have any cake or candles so I substituted a piece of toast and a match, hopeful that would be enough for her. I even coated it in cinnamon and sugar to make it sweet. Toast and phone in hand I went to my bathroom, the only place with a mirror, and set up for our ritual. I placed the phone in a spot she could see me, she asked if I could get the mirror in the camera as well but the angle just wasn’t quite right. I placed the piece of toast in one hand and used the other to strike the match and shove it into the middle of the bread. I quickly locked eyes with myself, I didn’t have much time before the match burned out. This time I felt different. Like someone else was looking back at me. At least she was smiling. Was I smiling?? I guess I should be, I was making a wish for my birthday. I decided to keep things simple and wished to be happy and healthy. And something in the back of my mind told me to ask for protection. So I did that too. I closed my eyes and blew out the candle. When I opened them my mom was smiling, relieved. “Did you get your picture?” I asked. She nodded and gestured at me to eat the toast. As I chewed she said, “Another year completed. Thank you. Are you still hungry?” I swallowed and shook my head no. She looked me over before stating, “Good. And I better see you home soon!” I smiled and promised to head home this weekend once I finished up at work. We said our goodbyes and hung up. It’s funny. I wasn’t hungry, but for some reason that year I felt… Empty. And I’ve felt a little more hollow ever since.